The 100 Gratitude List

I’m taking a workshop with Brooke MacNamara and Lauren Beale Cultivate: Creative Practice in the Face of Uncertainty. It’s been a great workshop to tap back into my creativity during a time when we are all retreating within and navigating this very uncertain and raw world.

There was this practice of making a list of 100s, really to generate ideas, get us beyond what we think is the obvious. I loved it because I had to re-define my list. Instead of all of the things I wanted to do, I created a list of the ways I wanted to be with sound texture (wind between the maple trees), stop.

Friday I was awake early and wired – a year ago we had such a powerful and impactful experience – and we’re here- ALIVE! So I spent the morning writing my 100 Gratitude List, What are 100 things I’m grateful for – experiences, nature, and food.

Barton had seen a glimpse of it on my computer so that night, so I let him read my list. That was even more moving, to see someone honor and be so moved by the gratitude list I had created. We laughed, cried, and looked deep into each other’s eyes.

When the days feel like they will never end, when I get lost in hopelessness and despair at how we are treating each other, let me return to this list. To remember who rich my life has been, how deep and wide, and how many phenomenal experiences that decorate and color the years.

1. LOVE
2. B’s laughter echoing down the hall
3. Sun streaming in the bedroom in the summer
4. Writing by candlelight before dawn
5. Open Mic Readings
6. The hawk’s morning call
7. (Bucket list) William Ackerman with my dad
8. Japanese Tea Garden in CA with B
9. (Bucket list) Barton’s hike up Mount Adams
10. (Bucket list) Semester in Australia
11. Kona in the morning before we’ve woken up
12. Snuggle cocoon
13. (Bucket list) Publish a book (Ink in the Wheels)
14. Cardinal in the big oak
15. (Bucket List) Seeing the Grand Canyon
16. Randolph- rocking chairs, hiking, rhubarb pie, raspberry pie, chilly mornings, staring at the mountain, thunderstorms in the mountains, pink sunsets
17. Orbs of dew on a blade of grass
18. We have enough to eat today
19. My work – sustainability, service leadership, positive environment, engaging
20. B – Budo on Zoom
21. Morning movements + stretches
22. Breath
23. My Mom’s paintings
24. (Bucket List) Maya Angelou with Mom
25. Creating our home
26. (Bucket List) VIP meeting Michelle Kwan
27. Bunnies frolicking
28. Butterfly wings
29. Ocean waves – sunrise
30. Chocolate chip pancakes
31. Kick-Ass Coffee
32. (Bucket List) Toronto CN Tower
33. YoBa on Zoom
34. Connecting with Soul family
35. Blasting music in the van
36. MV-1 – sitting in the van feeling how anything is possible
37. (Bucket List) Speaking at AM General (impact -what accessible van means)
38. MV-1 #2 Firefly – sitting in the van knowing we are alive
39. WE LIVED
40. The ambulance driver who brought us home
41. B- Baclofen pump survival
42. (Bucket List) William Ackerman with B
43. M- survived surgery
44. (Bucket List) M B-day Chaka Khan on my B-day!!!!!
45. I’m Every Woman
46. The tough experiences that grew me – Mom’s death, MG
47. Be challenged
48. Durango – hands out wide twirling in the snow mountains
49. (Bucket List) Mesa Verde
50. Watching meteor showers at 2am
51. (Bucket list) little bear who came to say hi
52. Double rainbows
53. Training
54. Lisa – challenge me with B
55. Wrapped in a blanket on cold mornings
56. B – Leadership / CTI
57. The two of us bursting someone’s internal barrier – watching it fall down in front of our eyes
58. (Bucket List) Hand gapping over mouth – I Feel the Need, The Need for Speed (cannot believe it, just cannot believe it), taught me so much – Bounder
59. Bantering
60. Morning walks
61. Dinner on the balcony of Chuey’s
62. Sushi
63. (Bucket List) Whiskey tasting party for B 40
64. Camping in the mountains
65. Campfires
66. (Bucket list) Writing and producing play DPAC
67. Solving a really hard problem
68. The release after tension
69. Dancing!!!!
70. 5^th Year Anniversary with B – we survived Nor’easter!
71. Bear, Basho, Beowulf (the 4-B’s)
72. Morning help when we had it
73. Soooo much support from our families
74. Saturday crash days
75. Reading to each other at night
76. Cinnamon rolls at Deja Brew
77. Sun streams
78. Watching a creek, the water bubbles
79. Water + rocks
80. A really great conversation
81. Sweat lodges / training
82. Luminous conversations on our trips
83. The deer I the road, two going the opposite direction as the herd
84. (Bucket List) Cabin in the woods, Shenandoah Valley
85. Trip with B – pop up parking lot breakfast in Little Switzerland
86. (Bucket List) Visiting the MacLeod Castle (Dunvegan), the hike, the white horse galloping down to greet me, double rainbows
87. (Bucket List) Visiting the Alamo
88. Taking photographs, seeing the beauty in the world
89. Spontaneous laughter where you can’t stop
90. Coffee with Mindy
91. Maples with B’s coaching friends
92. Helen
93. Bubbles in the wind
94. The sound of thunder
95. (Bucket List) going to So You Think You can Dance
96. Twirling
97. B looking over me after surgery
98. (Bucket List) seeing Kristina Tippet
99. (Bucket List) Toni Morrison with Mom
100. Really good wine
101. Anniversary meal in Tucson with B
102. Haiku poetry in Asheville
103. Compassionate Expressions Retreat
104. Blue jays being pushed out of the nest
105. Art show with my Mom
106. Listening to really awesome music that moves the soul